Love and Support and Everything...Everything....

I am feeling very full and buoyed and I have to share...bear with me for some heartfelt gushing coming out of nowhere perhaps to you all but definitely from somewhere for me...

I know I am a handful...this creative biz and artistic journey that I am in is one that I've been heavily involved with for well almost my whole life, but definitely the past 20 years...it's incredible and I am beyond lucky to be on this path, I know this everyday but that being said, it's not easy by any stretch of the imagination...The ups and downs I experience as a very sensitive and very creative person take their toll, in bad ways such as much stress & migraines but also in beautiful delicious good ways...

Today I have to express how so so grateful I am because I have a partner who lifts me up when I spin and spin my rusty wheels into what I fear is a hole I'll never find my way out of! He picks me up, dusts me off...polishes my wheels till there shiny and inflated and than puts me down again to watch me and love me as I go either in the same direction, often back into that same hole, ha ha or in a totally new direction...

I am working so hard on growing my creative biz, I think I am burning myself out on some levels a bit but at the same time, that is my routine, it's how I work best quite often and I think I know I can work this way safely and come out on the other side even better because I have the unflinching support that I do.

I am feeling so overwhelmed, so fully fully supported in my creative struggles and successes...so utterly full of love and strength because of one person, and that amazes me...

It's almost unfair that one person could be everything...that one person can believe in us even more than we do in ourselves some days...there is no doubt in my mind that most of us creative types are incredibly strong, we have to be, to keep putting our hearts and souls into work that quite often is not wanted or used or sought after, etc, and we usually don't give ourselves enough credit...but today I send out thanks to one person...I am giving credit where credit is so incredibly due....

I feel like I am in constant warmth and care, that my obsessive tender little heart has the best home that it could ever possibly have outside of my body...I feel that my hand is always held and my worries & dreams always supported...

I am feeling so lucky...unbelievably lucky that all the craziness and creative uniqueness that is me, that all my insecurities and ego, that all my blissfullness and all my tears, and that all my demands and needs make me quite the hand full to deal with and shoulder...but you know, all of this, all of it is just turned back around to me to be seen as part of the magic that is me.  That the 'crazy' is loved just as much as the 'sane' lends to such a security...one that nutures even more creativity & dreams...

...'Wow'...I must shout out a big big 'WOW' and many many heartfelt happy heart sighs and the biggest ever and constant 'Thank Yous' to one unique artists dream, who knows who he is....XXXOOO

This Emmy Rossum song often hits close to home for me & never fails to strum on my heart & always reminds me of the unflinching support I have.