I feel as though I can get back to my blog
abit more now...the heartache of loosing
Hazzy is still present of course but time does heal and though I'll miss Hazel every single day like all the babies who have left us before her
atleast now I can
maneuver through a day without feeling hate and anger towards any normality. The
suddenness of her leaving is still leaving me somewhat shocked and numb however, but the old adage of 'Time Heals' is indeed very true, I know this and will wait patiently for it and rely on it.
So today, I am at my beautiful artist's collective Art On Main, all day long...I took a shift from another fellow artist to force myself out of the house and I do love being here, I feel better already. It's not just being surrounding by beautiful works of art that is cheering but the store itself just has a happy and easy vibe and I need that today,
especially since a very annoying headache has been haunting me for 2 or 3 days now with a very sore left shoulder
that's just pulling pulling pulling to aggravation...and also of course a deep ache in my tail bone area has set in too. I've been away from my yoga practice for much too long and these little pains reminds me so.
So today I write this post from the counter of the store, Patricia Barber is playing...and with Hazel on my mind I choose this old
rabbity image of mine to share today...
Today whiles at the store, I am working on the final
papercut. The series of 8 will be shown in the storefront window in October so those must be prepared and finished up. I am also happily working on sketches for new pieces for my quickly upcoming exhibition...which I've finally decided will be entitled "Woman's Work".
As I sit here I am watching a small group of people looking at my coloured pencils and Nubbins in the window and pointing at this and that...oh..and they just came in the store...it's a good feeling to know that my work is bringing people into the store...and I am not just assuming that, I say so because I've been told it was so, ha ha....My heads not getting big or anything no worries!
I don't know...as I ramble on I must confess that I somehow feel like Hazel is still with us and then there's strange things like Jinny never being a big eater before suddenly eating voraciously...like Hazel used to do. Or,
Jaks suddenly digging and ripping up his boxes with happy abandon which never used to do but Hazel loved doing... maybe parts of her precious soul went into the remaining lovelies still gracing our warren...can that happen? I don't know but
that's how I've been feeling.
So it is almost lunchtime...I need to get this
papercut done soon so that I can have
atleast half my shift for sketching so I should get going. Thanks for those very few of you have expressed sorrow on our behalf...Jenn over at
Kanna Glass in particular...Jenn your note made me teary and I know you understand my current state...thank you for taking time to reach out. Everyone else thanks for giving me space...because at times like these those who know me well know that I can't help but pull away and become very introverted...my best friend
Judit for gently checking up on me every couple of days..and mostly thanks to my honey, your forever my rock and always helping to pull me out of the overwhelming tides. We've had 6 furry hearts leave us now, 5 of whom have died in my arms...it's not getting easier, I guess I shouldn't assume it would but boy oh boy it hits me hard and takes
alot to get back to myself...and those that respect and love me most are the ones who accept my greiving process...because the rabbits are not 'like' our babies...they ARE our babies and I love the fact that as I get to know myself, as I get stronger, as I grow...I can see that the people who can't accept this part of me aren't people I need to closely associate with and that epiphany is worth its weight in gold...
I leave you with
my favourite Patricia Barber song "Snow"..enjoy...I am...Be Well and extra kind to your own tender hearts...