Rabbits These Days

Ella Luna and Roo seem extra content these days...

They snuggle together and kiss all day long by the back door,

Taking in sunshine and fresh spring winds...
And the snow!  For the last 2 weeks anyways.

I am home with them day in and day out so they get lots of healthy snacks throughout the day.
And, as you can see, the floors are all covered with soft thick comforters,

so that our Ella Luna doesn't get hurt when she falls over or drags herself around,

We've been doing this for some time now but Roo still seems to think it's the best thing ever, ha ha.
He sinks into them like they are a puffy cloud, gives a big happy huff and than promptly falls asleep.

...And little Miss Sunshiny Sweet herself gets carried around &pampered like the little queen she is,
(she's getting such beautiful auburn colouring in her older age, it really comes out in the sunlight).

Her newest favourite thing is the time every day that we spend in Jin & Jaks room,

(not with Jin & Jaks because the 2 bun couples don't get along at all)
but on the big window bench that looks over the whole front yard and court...
She likes to people and car watch & every evening we watch the setting sun.

Life feels very good when it's full of rabbits, sunsets and art-making!
I am so grateful for this beautiful and full life.

XO Rabbit Addict, Mandy

My Love My Heart

She is My love and My Heart...

She's The Skip In My Step...

She's The Breathe In My Lungs...

and The Beat Of  My Heart....

She's My Precious One,

Completely Unique, Sweet & Wonderful...a Best Friend.

 The word 'Pet' is simply not synonymous with our Ella Luna...
or, with any of our bunnies for that matter,
Not in our world, life and story anyhow.

I am still struggling a little bit with balancing my time between Ella Luna and my artwork. 

Art wise things still feel a tad elusive & sticky...

But things are indeed feeling smoother and more settled
than the last time I wrote about Ella's leg troubles.

People have been sending me little notes asking after Ella Bella...thanks oodles you lovelies.

She is not necessarily doing better...this isn't something she'll ever get better from,
But she is doing just fine, she is a tough nut and she is a happy girl, that's for sure.

We did have a custom 'wheelchair/cart' made for her,
But, it just isn't working out as we had hoped.
So we are still doing the tried and true method of plenty of time on the floor with her,
We gently support her right side and leg and in doing so she can move around like normal,
(it's just slightly tiring for us because boy oh boy she's fast, ha ha).

I am in the midst of trying to figure out some kind of 'baby sling',
Because it's a nice break for her to get off her feet and be carried around by her mama.

The beauty of finding balance in life continues...

It's going well & I am grateful .

XO Mandy and Ella Luna

Adjustments, Honesty and Balance

I think I am FINALLY learning to accept and adjust
to the fact that my beloved girl, Ella Luna, is handicapped & won't get better...

and that I am spending more time with her and bunnies, than ever before.

Life feels like it has changed
Some days it feels like it's changed just alittle.
But most days it feels like it's changed alot.
I guess I wasn't expecting to feel such a shift,
since our whole daily routine has pretty much always been centered on the bunnies welfare,
and we have dealt with serious & long-term rabbit ailments before,
 but none have felt like this.

I know some people out there will be saying
'But, Mandy in the GRAND SCHEME of things this isn't a problem at all' or
'Don't take it all so seriously, it's just a rabbit after all'
(I've heard both in variation numerous times!)
But, we all have our own truths, paths and stories, none more important than the next really...
and well, to me, Ella Luna's leg troubles feel big & the circumstances feel demanding...
Adjusting and Juggling our new daily routines of living with a handicapped loved one,
who in this case also happens to be a rabbit...
hasn't been easy...

The biggest adjustment is just in seeing our loved one less than her perfect self
and having such a hard time...we feel helpless, desperate and frustrated
with ourselves because we simply feel like we should be able to fix her.
If I could take on that bum leg for her, I would in a split second.

It's also been affecting my studio time as well...
and time away from my work/studio never sits well with me.

Jonathan is helping me slowly realize that I am doing everything I possibly can
and that I can't be with her every minute of the day,
but still, there is a real push and pull tug of war going on within me,
For I find at the present time,  I can't feel good about being in my studio
when my little precious one, struggles to move around without my aid.
And, when I am in my studio & with my work, I find it tricky to switch gears
and get down to serious work because I just want to be with my girl.
Right now I am mostly sneaking in my art time during Ella Luna's sleepy times, ha ha.



This is where my honey would suggest I interject a big & honest
"Don't feel too bad for Ella"
because other than that bum leg, she's doing great.
She's healthy and happy and very well loved & hugged.

Some days, the leg even improves abit & she can get a few wonky hops in here and there...
Sometimes, we find her sitting up perfectly straight all on her own.

We do spend alot of time bathing her and than gently blow drying her nice and dry,
Because she can't stand/hop normally, she often pees on herself
and we can't have her getting 'urine' scald'...though if you could see her,
you'd be able to tell that she likes the
blow-drying/snuggling sessions very much....
and because of the way she drags herself,
the friction causes her fur to rub off in a few areas & some small sores to appear,
so we are staying on top of that with band-aids & creams & most of the fur is growing back already
.Just incase she has any discomfort, she is on anti-inflammatory meds twice daily, 12 hours apart...
and per doctors orders, needs plenty of daily physio (which she also seems to kinda enjoy)...

We find ourselves in a very awkward spot when it comes to
leaving the house for long periods, ugh...and we are admittedly missing our weekend getaways...
BUT
We wouldn't trade Ella Luna for a trip around the world.

Life is never static, and with change comes some unbalance, it's normal & healthy.

Life is a beautiful balancing act.

The struggle to adjust & to find time for everything is just part of the dance,
I know all this.
And despite any struggles this whole thing with Ella Luna presents,
The days are still steeped in goodness & beauty & I love that fact...

(living as a severe migraine sufferer, I learnt long ago to see beauty in the simplest of places)

Sometimes yes, things feel abit blurry and wobbly...
and we feel like we'll never adjust or find a way to fit everything in...
But, I think part of the beauty of the balancing act is to just allow oneself to surrender
to not being perfect & to allow ourselves to feel the overwhelm...
To not fight against what we know is the utmost important thing at the time being,

(for me, that's making sure my little fur-people are A-Okay)...

And than trusting that everything else will find it's time and place.

I know I'll find a balance if I don't fight against it.

So the current plan is to just keep snuggling & caring for all the bunnies,
Keep on giving Ella Luna every loving minute that she deserves and needs,
Create whatever art work I can during bunny nap times...
and to not be so hard on myself for whatever else may temporarily fall to the wayside.

Cheers Everyone,
To being able to gently and respectfully accept or own truths and stories, as well as those of others...

I say CHEERS,

 to changes and being able to see the beauty despite the hardships...

and Cheers

to knowing balance will make a beautiful appearance if we just trust ourselves
& in the universe enough to let go, even just a little bit...

Thanks For Listening.
XO Mandy, Ella Luna & Roo

Some Kind Of Wonderful

Abit of time on the back deck is a tonic for winter bored bunnies...
(This was a couple weeks before Ella's legs took a turn for the worse)

Ella Luna always finds some branch to chew on or dried out leaves & pine needles to munch on,

whiles Roo, our snow bunny, stretches to munch on the cedars surrounding the deck and once he's full, he bucks and jumps and zips and zags all silly like making everyone laugh & feel lighter...

I've noticed that because Ella Luna can't go out quite as much as usual,

(Because her right leg muscle has atrophied & she has arthritis in it & going outside for
long stretches, especially on the slippery snow and ice, is just abit hard on her now).

Roo doesn't really have as big of an interest as usual,
I guess he doesn't want to leave his girlie behind...

really VERY sweet if ya think about it...

It's hard to see our favourite little ones get old...

but as long as they keep going strongly, aren't in pain, eat well, and are happy with a zest for life,
as they all without a doubt currently are,

Than we'll keep helping them with everything we've got, ever second along the way...

Because in my books they are without a doubt, some kind of wonderful.

XO Mandy & Ella Luna and Roo, Jin and Jaky XO

Ella Luna Is Back Home

Well Ella Luna is back home and on the mend...thanks goodness.

The time leading up to the surgery was stressful and I kept panicking.

The day of the surgery was terrifying as usual...passing her off the the doctor and nurses is always one of the worst feeling in the world to me...I have a really hard time with that.

BUT we have the best vet ever. 

He let us stay with her in a private room with binkies etc..

right up to the minute he came in to knock her out for the operation.

The cut is much more extensive then we expected for once he got in there the infection

was spread along that side of the body more than anyone thought....

But now she's home and on the mend. 

I am breathing normally once again

and our heart rates have returned to normal, somewhat, ha ha.

The cut looks good so far, and it's not bugging her nearly has much as her twice daily antibiotics

or the sweaters we are making her wear to help avoid little miss from picking out her stitches.

This darling of ours has had 3 surgeries before this one and every time she nimbly picks out the stitches!!!

You can find me sitting on the floor with her in the wee hours of the morning, making yet another sweater, since she pulls and nibbles on them so much, usually after a day they are worn out and don't fit anymore!



We are honestly pretty exhausted here in the warren of the Saile-Petersons, ha ha.

Jonathan had to use a few days holidays to stay home and help me with Ella.

Watching her and making sure she's okay, cleaning the wound 3 times a day, giving her the medicine, making sure she is not getting at her stitches, or getting stuck in the sweaters somehow! or not falling over on the sore side (she actually rolled over on her head and onto her back this morning whiles trying to wash her face!) is a full time job....we're even sleeping in shifts, so one of us is with her at all times.

Than there was the week before the surgery when my back went out, ugh!

and I had quite a few migraines due tot the stress no doubt but also probably abit too much painting...

Than I am feeling abit of stress knowing that the tax papers must be put in order and filed soon...

on top of sleeping on the floor and feeling abit bruised around the hips...

THAN

there's all the work to be done for my fast approaching solo exhibition...

plus I am nervous that the abscess will come back, which is a possibility

...but right now we're just happy our girlie is home.

My dad swooped in like an angel (an angel with a broken foot that is)

and took a bunch of my pictures home to make frames for them...and I know his framing rocks,

so that was a big weight off my pile...THANKS DAD.

Thanks also to everyone who emailed and wrote wishing her well, that meant the world. 

I passed along every single sweet word, snuggle and kiss that you guys sent.

XO Mandy and Ella Luna XO

Birthdays...

Today I am hopping in because it's a special special day for today two of my dearest and most favourite peeps are celebrating the day they came into this world....

...HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my Jonathan, who gets more amazing which each new year...

 ...and to our Ella-Luna, our little black beauty is turning a most brilliant 7...

....if you put your ear to my heart you would hear it thumping...'Jon, Ella, Jon, Ella, Jon...."

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY LOVES.

XO

Your M.

Our Girls Project...

Ella Luna really wanted me to pop in today to show you her latest artistic project...one that she's been working on diligently, one that she's been slaving over, with little breaks unless we force her too (because like her mama she's quite obsessive & will work herself sick!)...she's burying half our gazebo with this new little project of hers..  But shhh...don't tell her, it's us, who every couple of weeks will sneak out to fill it up!  Years ago we let her go on & on without any filling & well let's just say part of our yard actually caved in, ha ha.  When she appears to be done digging for the day, she than goes mad filling her mouth with grass & bringing mouthful after mouthful into the burrow to make a nice soft green bed for herself...

Roo Boo doesn't help, he just likes to lay & snooze in the freshly dug sand and watches his hard-working black beauty...

Seriously though, who could possibly deny this sweet little face her own burrow, ha ha...Tis the life with lovely & slightly spoiled bunnies:D

(I am trying not to freak out but it's difficult because Ella's bump is back, the same one she had 2 surgeries for this year already, it seems to get bigger by the day...we aren't quite sure what to do other than bring her in for the doctors opinion in a few weeks time & hope really really hard that it reaches a plateau & just stops growing....send us good mojo pretty please!)

My Process and Summer Days...

I've been feeling abit on edge the last couple weeks and I didn't quite know why, than it hit me, something sooo simple...too much time online which is often, for me a pretty quick and direct route to a whole bunch of stressing, worrying & negative thinking about running out of time to make my dreams come true and not being brave enough to let my creative biz soar...

It's okay, no worries, this is just my routine...the magic that is me, ha ha...I work and work and work and dream really hard, I spend to much time bouncing around online, I flounder about abit, I feel like I am spinning my wheels, I wonder who's looking and caring, I get discouraged (yet my flame is never even near being extinguished!) and than I remember what works for me, what my best process is and what really matters at the end of the day....

...I remember after a couple tiring and tortured weeks that all the stress and worry and excess time online takes me away from my healthy balance and my creating the work that is the main part of my dreams! And once again, like a hundred times before, I realize I can't rush this creative journey of mine, it is what it is and it will be what I want it to be but rushing won't help anyone, especially me...

...SO, I am once again only allowing myself only a few hours online each day and than I get back to what has always embraced me in kindness, calm and abundance...to all of the simple pleasures that help fuel my creativity; coffee, naps, favourite old movies, bike rides, lunch with friends, playing outside, reading, rearranging furniture, baths...and of course days which are beautifully full of time for art making, honey loving, bunny snuggling, music blasting, dancing, good food, time outside with large pastels whiles bunnies romp around my feet...

...you get the point....I am back in my balanced state, it probably won't be for long, I am after all a creative through and through, ha ha but today...today indeed my spirit is calm, my heart is smiling wide and my creative aspirations are feeling incredibly strong willed...

...Ahhhhh...and even my headaches & migraines haven't even been that bad this month, whoot whoot...

....Today I am wishing you all a great weekend with full, calm, happy and hopeful hearts...the photos below show what our weekends usually look like...

We don't have any big & exciting summer plans, no travel will be had...well we did have 1 event that I was looking forward to all year but that was cancelled on us...the bunnies keep us pretty housebound, which sometimes is abit hard because even though we are both homebodies, we are also equal part road hobos who love jumping in the car at a whim BUT when it really comes down to it, we never complain because we wouldn't trade our bunnies for a trip around the world...so indeed, we're having beautiful summer days...hope you are all as well...especially to all you 9-5ers...See yous next week. XO Mandy and the Buns, Ella Luna, Roo, Jin and Apple Jaks.

p.s. Some of these shots will be in my "Bella Bijou" photography shop, opening soon, I am going to take a leap with this, I believe in my photographs and hoping others love em too!

p.p.s I am going to take a couple days off from posting and will be back with you with some new work, oodles of bunny pics and other goodness next Wednesday...

A New Beautiful Bird Sitting Pretty...

Finally I can show you a new Beautiful Bird...sturdy on it's own little branch, sitting comfortably in all it's own lovely glory...sitting softly amongst it's own coziness...peaceful...full...content... ...just like the little artist who made him, ha ha....our concert was cancelled and rescheduled till the end of April...but I didn't care all seems good with my little world today. Ella got her stitches out first thing this morning, they came out lickety split super quick...thanks to Ella, she apparently undid all the knots for the doc! He was laughing...Ella is happy to have her sweater off and the doc said not to worry if the bumps come back, only if they get super big, he just wanted to do that 2nd round of surgery to give her more chances to be well...so for now we're going to try to put that worry aside and sit happily for awhile...we can do so because Ella is home, stitches are gone and suddenly whatever felt all helter skelter seems righted and perfect today....new people have visited and commented on this beloved blog of mine, that always makes my day...it's cold out but the sun is shining and the buns will go out to stretch their legs later on...I am going to paint and colour and transfer some new drawings today...listen to some loud music....probably dance around abit ha ha...maybe even take a much deserved nap...movies are on tap for tonight...as well as an opening for a friend...indeed all is good today, I sit comfortably in my own softness, nice and cozy, peaceful and full...not at all worried about falling off my branch for I think for now, atleast for today, the wind has stopped trying to blow me off...wishing you all the same coziness...Happy Weekend All...Happy Day...

....I am Working Away...

Hi All...I know I promised new work Monday but with everything going on with Ella Luna I find myself upstairs mostly with the laptop and my scanner and final bits of work are downstairs...so bear with me...I am toiling away, working on some new stuff, hanging out with the bunnies...making sure Ella keeps her make-shift sweater on, she's apparently a 'Houdini' at getting out of it! I do admittedly find it abit hard not to be able to get into my studio as normal because my head is jammed with ideals and projects but I also admit that I never get tired of watching her and her sweet little face... Tonight we're taking a much needed break away from home for a couple hours. My mom is kindly coming to babysit Ella Luna so that Jon and I can go to an 'Our Lady Peace' concert, I got the tickets months ago and though they aren't one of my favourite bands, Jon really likes them and I hear their excellent in concert so I really can't wait, I think my body and mind needs some good loud music to quiet it abit! I do have lots to share with you...until I get all the bits and pieces together however, bear with me!...Ella gets her stitches out Friday morning thank goodness, she's really anxious for them to come out, as we are, than life gets calm and normal again for abit, hopefully!

Ah Ha...A Turtle Neck Saves The Day...

I am so happy to be able to write that Ella is doing great once again...what happened was that because she shredded the first batch of stitches so badly the doctor wasn't sure if he got them all out or not. He said not to worry that if there were any left they'd eventually show up and we'd just bring her back in to get them pulled no problem...however on the weekend whiles cleaning the area we thought we felt 3 more stitches so on Tuesday we went back to the vets thinking 'oh lickety split this will be quick..." not so....turns out there was 1 stitch yes but the other things we were feeling were the lumps growing back already....anyhow a somewhat long story made short...I had to decide there all on my own to get her into surgery, the doc wanted to do it right away...so she went under the knife again...thankfully I was able to go back 2 hours later to pick her up. Our vet knows we know how to deal with rabbits just operated on, etc so he always lets our bunnies go home earlier than other animals, also because he is kind enough to know that they stress easily away from us and their home and he likes to get them back to that asap.

So of course we're in a constant state of terror now that the bumps will come back again, even if they are benign, it's not good if they do....then we face the decision of whether to put her through more surgery, or do we leave them, or if we leave them again how big will they get and of course the doc has the best chance of removing all of the tumor whiles they are small...ugh, it's all very hard on the nerves and heart...I honestly think we're taking it harder than Ella Luna, she's an incredible tough nut...and forgiving too, she was giving me a hundred kisses within the hour of getting back home...she was letting me know "No hard feelings Mom..." h ha. Also her appetite as been beautifully huge:D....any fellow bunny slaves will know what I mean by that being beautiful ha ha, because basically any rabbit not eating is a sick one...she is also now hopping normally again.

This time the cut is alot smaller, thank goodness, but I was so determined that this batch of stitches not get shredded so that they do come out perfectly and easily, we've reverted back to our usual 'sick bunny' routine which taking turns sleeping for 4 or 5 hours and than switching...but it's been so draining and we've tried cones etc, none of that worked, they simply aren't decided for rabbits let alone lops, we tried homemade variations as well...not that we plan to leave her side at all during the healing process BUT she's so lighting quick at pulling the stitches that it was almost impossible and as most rabbits she's obsessive and was constantly trying...we also caught Roo pulling on them and she was letting him...partners in crime the littl brats, ha ha. Anyhow we literally couldn't take our eyes off her unless she was sleeping and again fellow bunslaves know that most bunnies don't sleep for very long at all...5 minute spurts if your lucky.

Suddenly last night around 3 am an ideal struck me like a bolt...I ran downstairs to my studio where an old turtle-neck sweater as waiting to be turned into a stuffie:D and I cut the neck off and adjusted the size to fit her and VOILA....something to help us keep those stitches looking good...ha ha...I must admit am I am quite proud of this clever solution and upset that I didn't think of it sooner! I guess we may have if we were the type who dressed our rabbits up, we did try those cloth wrap bandages but that was a no go...we still want to watch her of course but now we can rest more easily....this solution, allows her to move around freely, pee and poo like normal and wash most of her body, its soft on the wound, it's not too tight, so far it's working like a charm...I just wanted to pass this story/ideal around for any fellow bun hood parents:D

I also have to send a thank you out to Jonathan, who I think is one of the best bun dads in the world...I don't think any other guy would stay up for nearly 42 hours, or sleep in shifts or run to the grocery store for a pineapple at 4am...he is as dedicated and as in love with our furry babes as I am and I just adore that about that wonderful man of mine:D.

...Thanks to my mom who drove me back and forth to the vets when our car was sorta dead and for putting up with my flow of tears and terror at yet another surgery...

...omg, it freaks me right out, the thought that something might go wrong and my baby might not wake up. We've had 6 fur babies leave us so far, and I held 5 of them in my arms whiles they breathed their last breaths...and it doesn't get any easier and the knowledge that I'll have to face this again soon just completely sinks my heart and soul , I don't handle it well at all and I know I'll never have my rabbit sanctuary unless I somehow toughen up with health problem, scares and deaths...but I don't know how but I am working on it!...

...ANYHOW....also, big thanks to our vet, he's been involved in our bunny journey for some time now, he's knows rabbits and always does his very best for our babies, he is kind, he is sensitive and he puts the animals first, there aren't many people we trust with our buns, especially in scary situations but he is indeed one, for anyone in North Bay, Jon and I always highly suggest Dr. Paul Sidhu.

Also thank you to my fellow AOM collective members, Catherine, Jenn and Rosemary...I don't think they ever visit my blog but it meant the world to me that they covered my shifts so I could stay home with Ella....so to all these dear people who helped us I am sending a big hug and thank you to you all.

See yous all Monday with some new work most likely:D

Ella Luna...

I am popping in with a very quick note today to let you all know that I'll not be posting for a few days...today Ella Luna had to have more surgery and though she is already back home with us, already eating etc...we'll be taking turns sleeping short shifts over the next week and a bit to make sure one of us is constantly watching her since she has a nimble and quick stitch removal ability! Anyhow my computer time will be limited as I know you'll all understand. Poor little thing is too sore to hop so shes walking with her back feet like a cat... Anyhow, this is a portrait I did of our Ella Luna as a birthday gift to Jon, I think it's from 2007 but I didn't think you'd mind seeing an older work just for today, especially when it's of an exceptionally beautiful bunny girl:D I am off to sit and watch my little girl...I swear that little rabbit is WAY tougher than her mama and dad, ha ha....send us good vibes...and see you again next week hopefully.